The star’s decision to undergo surgery wasn’t one she took lightly. Since she was 6 years old, the New York City native has struggled with her appearance. And after her parents — a subway singer (mom Alice) and taxi driver (dad, Ibnou) — split, she battled depression, anxiety and bulimia, which she eventually overcame through therapy.
“It has taken me years to realize that what I was born with is all beautiful,” she writes in her book. “I did not get this surgery to be beautiful. I did it so I can walk around comfortably in heels. I want to do a cartwheel. I want not to be in pain every time I walk up a flight of stairs.”
Ten months after her procedure, Sidibe continues to lose weight.
“I have a goal right now, and I’m almost there,” she says. “And then once I’ve got it, I’ll set another. But my starting weight and my goal weight, they’re personal. If too many people are involved, I’ll shut down.”
Even before she decided to get the surgery, Sidibe had some hesitations.
“I know I’m beautiful in my current face and my current body. What I don’t know about is the next body,” she writes her in This Is Just My Face. “I admit it, I hope to God I don’t get skinny. If I could lose enough to just be a little chubby, I’ll be over the moon! Will I still be beautiful then? S—. Probably. My beauty doesn’t come from a mirror. It never will.”
Indeed, the American Horror Story alum has come to appreciate her appearance, no matter her dress size.
“There’s nothing ugly about me. Anyone trying to convince me that I am — and it’s usually me — is wasting her time,” she says. “I was in a war with my body for a long time. If I’d started treating it better sooner, I wouldn’t have spent so many years hating myself. But I love my body now.
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